Sunday, August 1, 2010

Mama said there'll be days like this

The first thing that comes to mind after my Couch-to-5K, Week 1, Day 3 workout, is this song by The Shirelles:
Mama said there'll be days like this.
"There'll be days like this," my mama said.
(Mama said, mama said.)
Mama said there'll be days like this.
"There'll be days like this," my mama said.
(Mama said, mama said.)
At first,  I wasn't sure why today was so difficult.  I sat with the idea for a while in the quiet of an empty house.  Then I realized how unexpectedly emotional today was.  The day started with us attending the worship service at church.  Our pastor is leaving and this was the first time I'd attended a service since she announced that she was leaving.    I thought I'd dealt with the emotions already, but that was obviously NOT the case.  As Pastor Pam started preaching, I started crying.  She had moments where she talked through tears in her eyes.  I'm a very emotional person anyway, but I absolutely cannot watch someone else cry and not cry myself.

I've been to many, many churches in my years.  Some were good experiences and some were not.  Some left me feeling scolded as I left the service and others left me uplifted and ready to tackle the week.  Most of Pam's sermons were of the uplifting variety.  Regardless of the topic each week, she gave me something to think about.  Pam is the only preacher I've met to which I truly related.  I've enjoyed hearing others over the years, but none as much as Pam.  When I came to Oconee Presbyterian Church for the first time, I was out of sorts.  I felt out of place at our old church.  It was so large that we never truly made friends.  Of course, I knew people there, but not anyone really well.  Our former church had several pastors and none were as easy to relate to as Pam.  I felt a tugging to find another church home.  Really, the tugging wasn't for me.  It was more about my children.  I wanted them to have a church experience as a child, so that they can make informed decisions about their religious future.  I had a good friend who came from our old church and invited us to visit.  It was a hard decision at first, but we decided to give it a try.  Our church is a different type of church and  our beloved Pam is just a different type of pastor.  We have 3 more weeks to listen to her stories, enjoy her presence and savor her words.

Before anyone assumes that this is all sad, it is not.  It is really bittersweet.  I am sad that our congregation will no longer have Pam as our pastor.  However, I am so excited that we get to share Pam with others.  The people at Trinity Presbyterian are so lucky to have her.  She will bless them in ways they haven't even considered, yet.  It is exciting to know that she may bring others closer to Christ as she has done at OPC.  I'm thrilled she is following her calling and I hope she knows that she will always hold a special place in our hearts.

Later in the day, I attended my son's PreK orientation.  In general, I'm excited for him to go to school.  He loves it and thrives in the structure.  I found out that he has an excellent teacher...the same one the girly had for PreK.  It will be a great fit and it will be a good year.  While sitting in the orientation, I started to think about how big he is getting.  He is nearly 5 and has grown so much.  There are no more babies at our house.  It isn't the way I thought it would be.  I thought I would enjoy their infancy and then move on to enjoy them as preschoolers and school-aged kids.  I am excited that some things are easier with older children, but it still doesn't relieve the ache to have another.  Today's orientation clarified that.

So, I tried to do my 3rd C25K workout today, but it was really difficult.  Maybe it was my emotional state.  Maybe it was the 4 mile hike we did yesterday.  I don't know exactly why it was so hard.  Today was the first day since I started this that I thought I was crazy for even having such a goal.  I quickly put that out of my mind.  I will try again tomorrow and see how things go.

We all have bad days, right?

5 comments:

  1. yes, we do all have bad days, sweet girl, and if it makes you feel any better, I skipped boot camp this morning and logged another hour of sleep. Be careful you don't over-train. The hike isn't the same exercise, but it isn't rest either. And at age 49, I still want another baby too.

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  2. I've heard a lot of good things about OPC. I'm sorry your minister is leaving, but hoping you'll get one just as good!

    Don't give up! Some days will always be harder than others.

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  3. Oh, Linda! I sure wish a baby would appear or the longing would go away. That has been my prayer since Isaac was born. It is really hard.

    I don't think I'm overtraining at this point. I'm just trying to learn when it is okay to push and when I need to slow down. It isn't intuitive to me. It is all a learning process, which is part of the adventure.

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  4. Leandra--OPC is awesome. We have great people on the search committee and we will get a good person. It is just hard to imagine someone new right now.

    No giving up here! I'm in this for the long haul. ;-) I love your post on BIM!

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  5. Bad days make the good days that much better...keep up the good work!! ML

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